WATCH: Brevard Sheriff’s Deputies Arrest Man for DUI and Reckless Driving, Perp Gets Free Ride to ‘Ivey’s Iron Bar Lodge’

By  //  August 8, 2023

suspect identified as Nicholas Kaseta, 25, from Satellite Beach

ABOVE VIDEO: Nicholas Kaseta was arrested for DUI, Reckless Driving, and Resisting an Officer Without Violence and got a free ride to “Ivey’s Iron Bar Lodge” on a $1,500 bond.

BREVARD COUNTY, FLORIDA – Once upon a time not long ago, in fact just last night, Nicholas Kaseta foolishly journeyed into the area of Brevard County, where legend has it that Deputies suddenly appear out of nowhere at the slightest hint of trouble.

Nicholas was warned by family and friends to never do stupid stuff in Brevard County because if you do, he was told, you will go straight to the bowels of “Ivey’s Iron Bar Lodge.”

Nicholas scoffed at the notion of Deputies being everywhere and after filling up on “courage ale,” he boasted to his friends that he was not afraid of the big bad Deputies, and that he would show all of them that the myth of “zero tolerance for crime” was just an old fairy tale.

Climbing into his little red Sonata, Nicholas took off for the land of “zero tolerance” and while driving with no regard for his own safety, or that of others, was cruising the streets at times in excess of 95 MPH, driving so fast, that one of the tires came completely off his car leaving him with just a rim to drive on.

Realizing that a criminal was abound, a citizen “saw something and said something” by quickly calling Deputies to respond and protect everyone.

Soon after, the highly skilled team in the Communications Center called out units to respond to the area and intercept this reckless force that was putting others at risk.

The units arriving one by one with Starship overhead, quickly found the violator, who much to their surprise was still driving like a madman, with his flashers on as he sped in and out of traffic with only one front tire.

As the brave Deputies, sprang into action they were able to get the vehicle pulled over on the side of I-95 and then, just like that, Nicholas rolled down his window and began to communicate with hand gestures that looked like birds or that he for some reason was pointing toward the sky with both hands.

The Deputies began to communicate back with him telling him that for his own safety he needed to get out of the car and not do anything else dumb or he was going to get tased and maybe even dog bit by K-9 Kovu who was not very happy that he had been tossed around in the back of the patrol car as his human was responding to the area.

Caring not what the Deputies said, Nicholas then stuck his head out the window and continued to use hand gestures to communicate with the Deputies.

Oddly enough, something came over Nicholas as he suddenly realized that everything he had heard about “the land of zero tolerance” was true and that if he didn’t get out of the car at that exact moment in time, Deputy Walters was going to unleash his fur missile who had been trained to jump through car windows and bite criminals.

Realizing that the gig was up, Nicholas got out of the car and even though he continued to use hand gestures to communicate, he complied with the nice Deputies and got cuffed and stuffed.

Nicholas who was quite intoxicated, was ultimately arrested for DUI, Reckless Driving, and Resisting an Officer Without Violence and got a free ride to “Ivey’s Iron Bar Lodge” on a $1,500 bond.

The moral of the story is that if you are going to break the law you better do it in Orange County, cause we don’t play that in Brevard.

And of course, I’m pretty sure that once put into a nice comfy cell at the lodge, Nicholas figured out real quick that it was a bad idea to try and communicate with his new cell mates with the same hand gestures he used with our Deputies.

And all of the cell mates lived happily ever after with their new roomy…Nicholas.

– Sheriff Wayne Ivey